This week for my monthly human wellbeing blog I’m going to explore happiness. I’ll start with a very important question.
What makes you happy?
It’s weird we never spend long enough asking ourselves this question. After all, it is an important one. What makes you happy? I think many times in life we mistake things that give us gratification, for things that make us happy. Happiness is more than just an emotion, it should be a way of life. We should look at the very similar analogy: climate and weather. Weather is what’s happening outside today, whereas climate is a trend over a long period of time. Just as excitement joy and laughter are like the weather, happiness is far more like the climate. We’re not all going be dancing around, giggling hysterically and singing merry ditties all day every day, but over time we can give ourselves a way of life that fulfils us and those around us. If you take all the weathery excitement and laughter and joy and have it a bit more often, that makes for a wonderful summer!
I like helping people. It makes me feel good that I can make them feel good, so everyone feels good woo hoo! I’ll help my friends, I’ll help my neighbours, I’ll help my family, I’ll help a stranger too if they need it. And though at times I’ve tried to help people who have let me down, it doesn’t mean I stop doing it. Why, because in general, over time, I’ve helped far more people than have let me down and that makes it worth it. I don’t want to sound like some hero either, it’s actually quite selfish as well. It makes me feel good and it makes me happy.
Every single one of us should help others, just because we can. Share wisdom and knowledge with people, be there for our friends, help them through dark times, be dependable and trustworthy. Hell, all we’ve got to do is be nice, even that’s helping the world be a better place and it’s easy to do.
It only has to be a smile, a moment to chat or a shoulder to cry on. With simple things you can spread the gift of happiness to others and that is a beautiful thing.
Ever been looking at the distant mountains while the sun slowly sets, and the stars light the inky sky as it fades from blue to black? Or maybe felt the sand between your toes, crunching underfoot, listening to the cool waves gently lap the shore? Or walked through a misty forest the day after rain and smelled the trees and the soil as you listened to the breeze rustle the leaves, and heard nothing but the wind, the insects and birds? Yeah, it was nice wasn’t it? Happiness spoiler! Do that stuff more. It will certainly help you on your happiness journey. If you love concerts or fine dining or football matches (all of the above for me) then do it. Go there, experience it, feel the joy. It’s okay to do things you love. Some people don’t have the money to do the things they want I hear often. I know it sounds harsh but, get the money. Have an idea, start a business, invest, educate yourself in the things you need to know, so you can afford to do the things you love more often. Those experiences are what we look forward too, and we all know life would suck if there’s nothing to look forward too.
Can you be fulfilled if you don’t challenge yourself? You, you’re here on this planet, having the human experience that we call life, surely, it’s up to you what you do. Surely your destiny’s in your own hands. What are you capable of? What is your locked talent? What can you do better than other people? Answer these questions and you’re on your way to finding out who you really are and a path to happiness.
I’ve heard so many people in my time, tell me what they wished they had done or (my personal favourite) when they win the lotto they do whatever it is they wish they could do. Sure, you may win the lotto, I mean good luck and everything, but I wouldn’t go pinning my entire life’s goals on it. I think it’s more up to us, than the incomprehensible odds of winning the lotto. Our happiness is our responsibility. To make the most of this human experience and figure out whatever it is that will make us happy.
I find it’s always a good idea to surround yourself with positive people if you can. Those ones that bring you down and drain you simply aren’t for you. Don’t feel bad, they’re not a lost cause, they’re just not your kind of person. It certainly doesn’t mean they can’t be somebody else’s kind of person. You just keep your people around you. It is of course impossible to keep say, a negative family member out of your life. You don’t have to like them, but if you can accept the fact you don’t get on, you can keep them at arm’s length and be unaffected by their negativity. Chose the people you hang out with the most wisely, even if you can only count them on one hand. With great friends the happiness factor is sure to go up a notch or two and that can only be good for your human wellbeing.
What makes you happy is what makes you shine. It’s who you are and it’s what you do.
This life is about moments, some that are good, some that are bad but if you could have more good ones than bad ones, you’re winning in my book.
So now ask yourself again: What makes you happy?
Check out other blogs in the human wellbeing series.
Barry Brunswick is a children’s author. You can buy his children’s books on Amazon, The War of The Turnips, The Secret Tale of the Cupboard Gnome, the short story collection Barry S. Brunswick’s Tall Tales and the new adventure of a generation – Dreamland Part 1 The Fabric of Dreams.