Hey there friend!! Welcome to the best blog about the life of a wizard!
This week I’ll need to get to the library to do some research. Sounds easy right? Well if was the run of the mill, high street library you’d probably be right, but this is the ancient library where all wizardly knowledge is kept. I know, I keep telling them to go digital, but these wizards are really set in their ways.
So, now I have to do the three-day trek, through the swamp, across the green hills, and all the way to the Grand High Wizard’s castle in the mountain. And to be honest, he’s a bit of a you know what, cos even though it’s my right to read the scrolls at any time, he’ll make me virtually beg. Ego is not befitting of a wizard, let alone a “Grand High” one. Well I guess I’d better grab my staff my magical steed, Horace the unicorn and jolly well be on my way.
Trip to the Library: Day 1
It’s evening and the sun has gone down over to the west. As is the way with the wizard’s life nothing is ever easy. I made it through the swamp but not without my share of glitches.
First of all Horace didn’t fancy it this week, he said he was chilling with his family, which is cool and everything, so I decided to shrink myself to a small size and ride a frog across the swamp. Everything was going hunky dory until we hopped to a log, at least what we thought was a log. It was only an enormous toothy crocodile. I had to think fast as he tried to turn me into a mere morsel for his rumbling belly, I quickly said the secret words, words so secret I cannot write them here for fear of being turned into a hedgehog by the Grand High Wizard himself, anyway I turned the croc into a cuddly swamp otter. Don’t worry he’ll be good, it’s only a 24-hour spell. He was just doing what crocs do. I’d probably do exactly the same if a nice tasty sandwich landed on me!
Talking of things landing on things, then the purple bottomed monkeys started throw poop at me and Froggy, so I had to create a force field, mischievous little blighters. Not only did I yell, but I had a good mind to shake my fist too. Finally, just before sundown, I was ambushed by a swamp monster, I banished him from whence he came but not before he sacred off poor Froggy, I had to grow back to my normal size and I got mud in my pointy boots. I hope the morrow is easier.
Trip to the Library: Day 2
I’m on the last green hill. Travelling the hills was a lot easier than the swamp let me tell you. But the swamp of course had on last surprise for me. Frogless and up to my boots in undergrowth, I put my foot right into a stinger faeries nest. They weren’t happy. They stung me a lot, until I felt a little giddy. I had to let them sleep in my spare hat a gesture of good will. I liked that hat! I think I’ll take the extra day to go round the swamp on the way back. There may be trolls but at least it’s not muddy.
On the hills I saw a huge herd of unicorns, Horace was with them, I did have to wonder why he couldn’t have brought me here, if he was coming here anyway, but who am I figure out the logic of the unicorn. They say they’re mythical but really, it’s only what goes through their heads that is the myth.
Trip to the Library: Day 3
Finally made it to The Grand High Wizard’s Castle just before sundown. He didn’t seem pleased to see me, started muttering something about being disturbed. I think he is a bit disturbed to be honest. I grabbed some of his turnip ale from the cellar to get my own back on him for being a grumpy bum. Tomorrow I do my research, tonight I’ll watch the meteor shower from the tower tall, bottle of ale and all, oh a rhyme. How delightful!
Trip to the Library: Day 4
So this morning GHW (Grand High Wizard) had a right grump on. He wouldn’t let me into the library until he’d finished grumbling about every story in the Wizard Review, his favourite newspaper. “The price of belching swamp toads” how “Another goblin village is being built on the edge of the woods” or “Good King Harold’s foreign policy decisions are nothing short of horrendous!” It was a snore fest to say the least, and I could done without it with my fuzzy ale morning head. Anyway, good news, I finally got in the library, and I can confirm the chocolate cake does indeed, have vanilla essence in it. I’ll sleep here tonight, and make my way back home come morrow.
Trip to the Library: Day 5
Back across the hills it was today. Saw Horace again. I asked if he’d take me back, he said, “My family vacation is not finished yet.” I suppose that’s fair enough. I’m camping on the edge of the woods tonight, tomorrow I’ll be heading through troll country, but at least I won’t get mud in my boots.
Trip to the Library: Day 6
I knew I’d have trouble with the trolls, they wanted to cook me on a spit with an apple in my mouth. I told them the story about a wizard who told trolls that quite fancied eating him ,stories all night. So by the time my story was done, it had been all night and they turned into stone. Works every time! Tomorrow I’ll be home safe and sound and I can’t wait. I’m pretty tired and that chocolate cake won’t bake itself.
Trip to the Library: Day 7
Finally made it home without incident, I did see Horace near home however, and I did have to wonder why he couldn’t take me as he was coming this way anyway. I asked him, he said that he wasn’t stopping there for long. He didn’t need to stop for long, just long enough for me to climb off him. Oh well never mind, I’ll never figure him out. May as well give up trying now. The chocolate cake was a huge success, so now I’ll spend the rest of the day writing cool stories for you. I’ll see you next week for another fun adventure.
Take care friend!
Barry S. Brunswick is an Author and Best Selling Poet.
Have you read Barry’s blog about the Fantasy Series?
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Dreamland Part 1 – The Fabric of Dreams
Dreamland Part 2 – The Masters of Light
Dreamland Part 3 – The Veil of Shadow
The War of The Turnips
Barry Brunswick’s Tall Tales – A Short Story Collection
Inner Outer – A Poetry Collection